March 31st, 2009 - The Next Big Election

Talk about mixing church & state.
I didn't even know he was running. Did I miss the primary?  What's Judge Miles Lord going to do? Or Jack Lord for that matter. I guess he could only run in Hawaii anyway.
We just get over another brutal election and now we have to face another, mud-slinging, name-bashing, "Us vs. Them" slugfest. Either you're with us, or you're against us. 
I can't wait to see what this ballot shapes up like.
You must show a complete voter registration identification, signs of stigmata will not be accepted, no matter how severe. Please be sure to completely fill in the sign of the cross in the box provided. Is there room for any write-ins? Buddha for Ombudsman?  Tom Cruise and John Travola on the Scientology platform? Martin Luther on the comeback trail? Ralph Nader will figure out some way to wheedle in at the last minute. Pat Robertson, are you hiding behind that sign? Who's going to step up from the darkside, Marilyn Manson? Alice Cooper, didn't you have political aspirations...? Be sure to completely blacken your chad. Or choose Allah the above...?