March 12, 2008

And in the category for the World's Tackiest Health Clinic Furniture,
I submit for your disapproval: "The Cone"
As the centerpiece of the Lakeview (the lake is unspecified) Clinic in Chaska, MN., 'The Cone' soothes and distracts your anxieties about that impending proctology exam or initial botox injection just as soon as you are admitted by the facility's automatic doorway. Somewhere captive in it's five foot diameter pastel base filled with rocks, water is being pumped rather noisily to the lip of 'The Cone' where it begins it's rippling cascade down the cheesy translucent plastic lampshadesqe sides, decorated with simplistic flowers of untaxonomical varieties. Churning and gurgling back into the base over the large rocks, the water sounds blend seamlessly with the omnidirectional and ethereal New Age blingings and whorfings being piped from speakers somewhere just out of sight.
This is truly a tacky and sublime space-filler matching the facade-like presence of this outer suburban strip mall office suite to a tee. Bravo.